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Live In The Moment? How Do You Do THAT?
It is difficult to live in the present, ridiculous to live in the future, and
impossible to live in the past. Nothing is as far away as one minute ago."
When people suggest that I "live in the moment" I understand the concept and
can recognize the value (I read and loved Eckhart Tolle's "The Power Of
Now"). But I secretly wonder, "How on earth do you really do
that?"
Yesterday, I spent one of the last glorious days of summer lazing
on the beach with a dear friend. We were basking in the final rays of the
afternoon sun when the conversation turned to his single status. He shared
with me that an old girlfriend, currently married was potentially about to be
single again. Knowing he had a "thing" for this woman in the past, and a
desire to be in a relationship now, I was all over the "potential" that they
may yet end up together.
Sensing his overt lack of enthusiasm over my
colorfully painted vision of his future, I asked him what was up; to which
he replied, "I don't live in the past or the future, I live in
the moment".
"Live in the moment? What the heck does that mean? How do
you do THAT?" I retorted, with plenty of excitement in my voice. He told
me he didn't know how he did it, he just did.
As afternoon faded into
evening his response stayed with me. I began wondering why I so automatically
move out of the present and into the future. I put myself in his shoes and
imagined how I might deal with the same situation. I discovered that I leave
the present and go into the future to protect myself. If I run all the
possible scenarios through my mind, good or bad, and "prepare" myself
for what might be, I figure, fore warned is fore armed? Right? Well, maybe
not.
Now, let this be said, I'm not saying planning's a bad thing,
or dreaming for that matter. But it doesn't escape my notice that a lot of
the future "projecting" I do isn't peaceful. My teacher and friend Byron
Katie is famous for saying "if you want fear on purpose, get a future, if you
want shame, get a past.
How are you doing with staying in the present
moment?
Here are some tips I've learned that help me stay a bit longer
in the present moment.
1. When you find yourself imagining fearful
scenarios ask yourself, "Is this the only possibility?" Search for what
else could be true, rather than what you fear.
2. Remind yourself that
worrying about the future or regretting the past isn't going to change what
has or is going to happen.
3. Do you have a fundamental trust that
whatever happens you're going to be ok? Can you find times from your past
that serve as evidence that this is true? If so, draw on that
experience.
4. Are your basic needs met, does your life work? Often we
move into the future because we think it will be better there.
Consider addressing what ever is not in balance so it will become
desirable to be more in the now.
5. Practice the power of the present.
Focus on something positive or beautiful right here and now and breathe it
in. Let yourself fully feel it.
6. Then, be willing to let go of that
too and move on to the next moment.
After our invigorating
conversation my friend and I walked to the waters edge to experience the
ocean. We both gasped when the chill of the water hit our bare feet. We
laughed and looked at each other and both expressed the joy of being able to
share the moment.
It's YOUR life.imagine the possibilities!
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